Trust

You may be deceived if you trust too much,
but you will live in torment if you don’t trust enough.
-Frank Crane

Trust is a dangerous thing. And it is such a great responsibility. Trust does not only mean being true to someone even when the whole world is against them, it is not only the belief that the other person will be there for you and catch you when you fall, it is not the faith in them or knowing they won’t betray or lie or cheat. It is more than just that. Trust involves all your thoughts and emotions being given to that someone else so that they could have it and keep it safe for you.

Trusting the other person means you are comfortable with gifting them the truth about yourself, showing them the vulnerable You and believing they will handle everything with utmost care. Trusting someone involves you being comfortable with the truth and what they feel and think.

Trust is a great power. But at the same time it is one of the most fragile things. Once you put your trust into someone and they drop it and shatter on the ground, it is hard to be replaced.
And sometimes to shatter it you even don’t need a proof, just a hint, a suspicion, one word. And the world is not the same anymore. Because it lost something it was based on, the Trust.

When you first realize that promises of forever love were broken, that you are being told lies, that the one you care and love the most was cheating on you, your small world crashes and you think life is an illusion. People are not real, feelings are made up. You are lost. You trusted them to keep your heart in one piece and now they broke it into million of pieces which you even don’t want to collect.

But what hurts more: the broken heart or the broken trust? The fact that you trusted your life, your feelings, your emotions to someone who didn’t know what to do with them and found no better way other than crashing all hopes and breaking all promises? One moment they say they will love you always and forever, and the next second you understand it is all a big lie. Always and forever do not exist. And you learn to accept the truth, to hide the pain and to smile with tears in your eyes. And you try hard to collect finally the pieces of that poor heart and bring them together.

But can you bring back the capability of trust? Especially when that one person regrets their mistake and asks for forgiveness. What do you do? Just pretend they don’t exist or let them into your life again? What do you do when that one person who was meant to be the love of your life, your best friend, your soulmate, the one you could always share your dreams and desires with… what do you do when they want to come back? When they smile at you and your heart melts, when they say they love you and you want so much to believe, when they ask for permission to be there Always and Forever? What do you do? When they ask for the second chance, and you know you love them. When you think about them all the time, in the mornings, during days and before you fall asleep, too.

When they say things and you want to believe they mean it. But trust is gone. You want to believe but you don’t know how. And everyone around tells you not to go for it again, because they don’t want you to get hurt more.

Don’t believe to those who say if there is no trust there is no love. Sometimes you love them but you just can’t trust them, and that sucks.

Of course they too realize they need to work on getting that trust back, but it doesn’t make things easier for you. You are confused and scared. Confused because you don’t know what to believe – your heart or your experience. Scared to be hurt again.

But you still remember that one person knows you better than anyone else. That’s someone who knew you and accepted you, before anyone else did. Or when no one else would. And no matter what happens, you will always love them. Always and Forever.

You just have to learn to trust again. And the best way to find out if you can trust somebody is to trust them. And then the trust is either there… or it’s not. And it is not that simple, and it can take a lot of time to get it back, and a lot of effort, and you might be mistaken too. But maybe sometimes we should be able to take our chances, some things are worth risking. You just have to try because every second chance begins with a first step. And maybe one day you will be the person who needs this second chance.

Some people say Never trust someone who lies to you, I would say Never lie to someone who trusts you. But in the end it is up to you who to give your trust to, just sometimes you can build it up for the second time and maybe it is worth a try.